Should I take him seriously?

I'm 22, he's 28. I'm from New York, He's from California. We met online June 2006. Had phone conversations, traded pictures then lost contact that summer. He instant messaged me October 2008 and we've been talking EVERYDAY since then. After long conversations, picture trading, webcam sessions, we decided to meet after two months. He paid for my airfare to come see him for a weekend. I stayed with him. He's a very well paid construction worker (bodybuilder body), lives alone in a nice apartment, drives a nice car, let me meet his friends and relatives. I liked it so much I decided to visit again at my own expense. I spent another two weeks with him this month. And he paid for EVERYTHING while I was there on both occasions (movies, restaurants, groceries, Starbucks lol.)



My problem is one night while on the computer, I noticed he didn't log out of his email account. I looked through it and found out he's been flirting with women on websites. I woke him up and confronted him and he said, "Babe, we're not together. So, I can technically do whatever I want. But, I do want to be with you. We just got to get to know each other more. Just because I comment someone online and send them pictures doesn't mean I want to pursue a relationship with them. I call you at least 3 times a day. I speak to you before I go to sleep so, you shouldn't worry about that. A lot of girls text and call me. I talk to them but, not like how I talk to you." It got me thinking, did he tell his ex girlfriend the same thing in 2006. After all, this is the same way he met me...



I asked him how he felt about me and he said, "I care about you a lot. More than I think I should. At times, I wanted to say I love you but, I wasn't sure if what I was feeling was real. So, I want us to take it slow."



I told him the reason why I felt disrespected was because, we were intimate. He said I'm not his girlfriend but, I'm doing things a girlfriend would do. Making dinner when he comes home from work, cleaning, having sex etc. We constantly talk about getting married, the wedding, naming children, getting a house etc. Now that I'm home, he still calls me everyday, calls me pet names, says he misses me and that he's saving to come visit me.



I planned on relocating from NYC this summer before I started talking to him. He said if I wanted to, I could move in with him this summer until I can make enough money to get my own place. But, he'd love it if I'd live with him so, we can start our lives together....



He's everything I'm looking for in a man but, that incident has me thinking about stuff. What should I do?! Sorry about the long story...Should I take him seriously?
sounds like he was looking for a cook,maid and a free piece of a@@,you would be better off staying in n.y. i hoped this helped
No way at all that you should be taking this seriously until you're at least living in the same state, let alone city! If he's having sex with you and doing all of this, he's the type of man who likes a woman at arm's length. No way he's going to be serious in the current situation. Sorry hon.Should I take him seriously?
dont be sorry it was interesting to me how you guys met and instantly clicked.



i dont think you should pay much attention to what you saw.

the guy from what i think seems to be sincere and you guys should build what you guys got right now.

i suggest you move in with him instead of trying to live on your own.

support each other
It seems to me right now he wants to be a bachelor. He enjoys meeting ladies online and getting to know the. He dosen't want to be tied dow now by officially having a girlfriend. What if your married and have kids.. Will you be scared he is online talking to another woman..



I don't think a man should do that. You are in a relationship. He should respect that and not talk to other women online.



What if he meets someone else who is beautiful, kind, and he falls.... he says you aren't together so it is ok to chat...What was he looking for when you met him online. He may try to find women out of town so he can do what he wants..You only know what he wants you to.



Be careful when it comes close to summer and the relationship changes... Start talking more about moving and see how he responds.. I would think hard, maybe too hard was with a very untrustworthy man. He likes womenShould I take him seriously?
Don't move in with him...he will have full control. If you two get into a fight he can kick you straight out in the street with nothing. He is playing you if he getting sex and everything else he want and still flirting with other girls just because of a title called "girlfriend". That is a slap dog in disguised, re-read your story and tell me how he ain't setting you up to be caught in some mess. He getting you to fall for him talking about he care for you more then he should and he flirting with other girls? No i think you should really think this over big time. You a woman, God gave you something he didn't give man, use it!