Please help!! I really like this guy who is acting really weird and I don't know what to do! :(?

Please help!! I really like this guy who is acting really weird and I don't know what to do! :(?

Gay male in my early 20's here. I feel really saddened and confused right now. I'll try to keep this as brief as possible!



We met a few weeks ago, he had just moved here to NYC from a small town in VT. (I'm 21, he's 19...not a big age difference but I think i can somewhat feel it). We immediately have this great connection, start talking to each other every minute of the day through texting. We go to dinner and movie, and have a great time. That night, he tells me he really likes me, and we talk all night, with him telling me "You made me feel better than I have since I've been here. I think you're so cool! I can't even explain how comfortable I felt tonight and how uncomfortable I've been since I've been in New York. Can we hang out again soon??". So I tell him I feel the same way and we make plans to hang out the next day. It seemed like a lot but I thought great, maybe he's just really sweet and genuine, and really just likes me a lot.



Next day, we go to dinner and then back to his apartment. He seemed to be getting pretty serious into things (which I don't at all mind, because I was really falling for him!): saying he wants to meet my friends, telling me that people he works with want to meet me, and even asking me to go with him back home to VT for a weekend at the end of the month. He even had the movie ticket and restaurant matchbook from our date the day before, taped on his wall! So we decide to watch a movie. During the movie, finally things start happening! He was holding my hand and had his arms around me. I had my head on his shoulder and my arms around him. It was really nice. He asked me to spend the night, and we fell asleep in each others arms. In the middle of the night, he woke up and finally kissed me and pulled me closer to him, (This may be too much info but he was also... yknow.. the entire night. Which tells me he's obviously attracted to me, right?)



In the morning, it seemed a little weird, quiet, awkward. But that night, he kept texting me all night (and if I didn't write back too quickly, he'd send like 3 or 4 at a time! Which I thought was cute). The following day I was busy, but we made plans for the next day. I'm a model and he's a photographer so he wanted to do a little photo shoot at his place. While I was on the train going there, (only a 25 minute ride or so), he texted me 6 times, sounding so anxious for me to get there! I had such a good feeling about the night and was looking forward to things progressing



I meet up with him and he's being really weird and quiet. We go to his place though and after a while, he loosened up and we started laughing and having fun and flirting. At one point we were lying on his bed and he had his arms around me, and was playing with my hair. But then he starts acting weird again.We go outside for a cigarette and he says "I think I'm just going to edit pictures and go to sleep tonight" I was just like "Um...do you want me to leave or something?", so he says "Yeah, after this cigarette". So we go upstairs and within two minutes, he starts acting cool again and says "So, what are gonna do tonight??" WTF???



He kept flipping back and forth between being weird and being cool. It got pretty late so we put on a movie. For the first like 30 mins or so, he has his arms around me and is being really flirty, and then all of a sudden (and NOTHING had happened, btw!) he starts moving away from me, to the extent that he almost fell off the bed! Then he asks me to spend the night ON AN AIR MATTRESS! WTF?! So between those two things, I just decided to leave! I had to go all the way back in the freezing cold at 4.30am, crying the whole way!



He texted me as I was walking home, so I wrote back, deciding to confront it. I told him I left because I really like him a lot and I though he felt the same way, but I feel stupid because he obviously doesn't. In the morning, I wake up to 7 texts saying "I'm so so sorry, I fell asleep and just saw that! Please don't feel that way!! I've just got a lot going on right now! I really want to be friends and want to be able to chill, and we could still chill and be friends right?? if you're okay with that, please!!!" So I wrote back asking if I did something wrong, because I didn't understand what happened. He says "No it's not you!!! It's me! I just got hurt so badly in my last relationship and I got so scared after that first night, Id just rather be friends if youre okay with that, Id absolutely love it!! You're so cool and you deserve someone much cooler than I am!" So I asked him if he's just not into me, or is he just scared that he is? And also said "I'm not asking for some serious thing or a relationship right awaPlease help!! I really like this guy who is acting really weird and I don't know what to do! :(?
Could be that he is afraid to get hurt. You told that he was burned in a previous relationship, and maybe he's afraid that you will do the same. He's just got a little too far ahead with you before came to that conclusion. Maybe he'd rather hurt you before you can hurt him. But you also mentioned Asperger syndrome - that could actually be true; his apparent difficulties in social interaction (this being his indifferent treatment of you) sounds like a sign. A person with Asperger syndrome also often have an intense interest in one thing (his photography). If that condition is the case then he might not even realize what he is doing to you. Or maybe my first assumption was correct. In any case, you should talk to him directly about this, if you can get his time and attention. But remember, you can't MAKE him like you. If he has changed his mind then you have respect it, no matter how much it hurts. I know, dude, love sucks sometimes. Best of luck to you.Please help!! I really like this guy who is acting really weird and I don't know what to do! :(?
I'm sorry, I feel for ya, but that was just too much to read.



I really hope everything gets better.Please help!! I really like this guy who is acting really weird and I don't know what to do! :(?
OK so there is NO way I could read all that.. it's just too late..

But remember.. communication is the key..

If they don't want to communicate then screw them.
I was smiling the whole time I was reading this. You guys are just so cute :)

It seems like he definitely likes you, ALOT actually! But he's afraid of getting hurt again. I say give it some time. Don't rush. Be friends and take things slow ! Just follow your heart and see where the wind blows you. Who knows you might end up being the ones for each other.



Godd luck :)



EDIT: OR YOU KNOW WHAT!! IF I WERE YOU I'D GO AND FRENCH KISS THE HELL OUT OF HIM AND MAKE HIM UNLEASH ALL HIS SUPRESSED FEELINGS! :P Sorry, but I get a little slutty sometimes hehe